Sunday, July 12, 2015

four seconds from guai

Just as we were pulling away in the car to go to teach English at the paper company, out of the corner of my eye I saw a police woman. It can't be for us, I said to F. He said we should wait a minute. And sure enough, I saw in my mirror that she had stopped right at our building. When you move in Italy you have to file your move with the powers that be and then they send someone to check that you are where you say you are.

I hopped out of the car. It turned out the police woman had been a student of mine when I taught fitness at Happy Gym the second year we were in Italy. Every memory of her I ever had came flooding back. I love when that happens. She looked pleased when I asked after her son who was getting a Masters in physical education. We shmoozed/abbiamo parlato del piu' e del meno and took off.

You can be completely screwed in Italy for having gone to work early. It is a question of four seconds. This time we were lucky. Normally, if you're not home they talk to your neighbors. But at 9:30 in the morning none of our neighbors are home either.

Speaking of neighbors, I have had quite a fright. On Friday at exactly the witching hour of 5:37 in the afternoon, I heard the unmistakable cries of a newborn baby. Did the Napolitan couple pull one over on us? Would we have to move again? Would my life and the vacation to Amsterdam be ruined? I still don't know. When I heard doors slam in the hallway I opened the peep hole in the door, but I couldn't get a handle on the situation. F tried to say that they could have visitors. My mind raced towards adoption because she didn't look very pregnant to me when we saw her a few weeks ago, but she seemed glowy and they have been fighting a lot. Then last night it happened again!  At the same time of day. Again, after twenty minutes or so the crying stopped. I don't know what the cavolo is going on.

We are trying to get the house perfect for the home exchange with Magda. I tried a new sunscreen and broke out in hives all over my face. I have a pulled groin muscle. Hives and groin injuries are really sexy, especially if you throw in some perimenopause. I want J-Lo to play me in the movie.

Tonight I have to go watch Roberto dress up as Robin Hood again because he asked me to. There is not enough mosquito repellent in the world for someone as delicious as I am to go in front of the duomo at 8:45 at night in July. It has been a stressful time and I need a vacation. Let me take three teenagers with me to Amsterdam. Because that's relaxing.

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