Monday, June 25, 2012

Sex & the City (without the sex)

 T is doing better. She has some roundness in her face again. Her numbers are better. She does the injections all herself and the blood tests. She pricks her finger ten times a day to do the tests and puts a needle in her belly or her thigh five times a day and she is still able to crack funny jokes and steal good moments for herself. She is super bored because we have been stuck in the house, but she is too weak to go out. We eat when she can eat and what she can eat. Every day she seems more back to how she was probably before February. The most impressive thing is that she still appreciates little blessings like that she gets excited to be able to eat as much broccoli or cauliflower as she wants because they don't effect her blood levels. She is amazing.

After a week without ever feeling the air touch my face, (minus one morning of shopping therapy that I permitted myself after these stressful days with my heroic daughter) finally I went out with my girlfriends. This is the group that I always dreamed of having my whole life. We are an equal foursome. My three partners in crime are each amazing in their own right. We got dressed up for each other or for ourselves, depending on how you look at it. They brought my girl a present and then they took me out for wine and made me eat even when I said I wasn't hungry. I love them more than words than can say. We took turns confessing all of our trials and misadventures since we were last together and made more noise at the bar than all of the loyal soccer fans who had turned out to watch Italia vs. Inghilterra in the big match tonight. We ended the night at the only big chain bookstore open on a Sunday night, where I convinced them to buy 50 Sfumature di Grigio/50 Shades of Gray so that I could figure out why a book that is so vile is also one that I can't actually put down. It took me 26 years to recreate that feeling of belonging which I knew during the few months in high school where I was part of a group of four girlfriends. It was a short-lived high that I have missed so much, I can't even tell you. When I came back home tonight, I felt like maybe I will even be able to wake up early and go to the doctor and the pharmacy and the f-ing middle school and get everything horrible done that needs to be done because I will know for sure that I am not alone. When I told them that we were like Sex & the City without the sex, they laughed and laughed.

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